Brain Fog and Me

I have been wrestling with brain fog lately. Lupus/SLE and Fibro can both cause it. Brain fog is a state of depressed cognitive function. Focus is greatly reduced. Brain functions involving numbers suffer from increased difficulty, even something as simple as figuring a tip. Emotional consistency is a struggle.


For me, it means being much more easily confused, I lose numbers entirely (from doing even simple math to remember things like ZIP Codes), multitasking is right out of the question, my ability to juggle emotional stressors is greatly reduced. Please remember, brain fog is not an illness of it's own, it is "merely" an added problem, usually springing up during sickness or flairs, but once in a while it will strike all by itself. 


Brain fog makes focusing difficult, so I have been flitting around while I write this, knowing that I want it done yet unable to really sit down with it and work consistently.


I have a good example. I have been reading How to Be Black by Baratunde Thurston. It is a great book, and I will review it here. But brain fog keeps getting in the way. Sometimes I look at the text and it just swims. Sometimes it looks fine but the words do not translate into ideas as I read them. Every once in a while, when the fog clears, I can read sections and write down what I think of them - I have several of those, but no where near enough to write an actual review. I feel awful because my review is late already, but brain fog will not negotiate. The book deserves better than me, to be sure. Note: I was given a copy to help spread the word - and you should know that. But that actually predisposes me to be harder on a book or product rather than easier! And yet, HTBB is still awesome. 


I will write more later, probably have a post out tomorrow. My current goal is two posts a week, and I am more or less doing just that.

The SmartAss Guide to Wheelchair Etiquette

(Updated!)

Alright, this is going to consist of one solid concept and then variations on what to do with that concept. With the amount of faux paux, ignorance, and just straight up bad behavior I have seen myself, I feel like this is necessary. I do not believe that I should have to add a sarcasm warning to something with the words "smart ass" in the title, but there you go.

If you find yourself sputtering “But, but…” or getting angry or defensive – well, you will have to deal with that. There are guides out there that are more politic, nice, and cater to the discomfort that the able-bodied or temporarily able-bodied feel in these situations. I do not give a damn about that. You have been warned!

Main concept: a person in a wheelchair is just that – a person in a chair. Person. Chair. That is it. The corollary to that is this: do not do ridiculous shit. If you remember nothing else, remember this, and it should guide you well.

Editorial note: I often just say "wheelchair" as that is the scope of my experience. As far as I know, all this also applies to the users of scooters and power chairs. If I am mistaken, please let me know in the comments and I will happily make appropriate changes.

Now let’s talk about how that plays out in real life.

Helping Kids Understand Differences

Kids learn by example to meet the unexpected

(via a great blog: FWD/Forward (feminists with disabilities), a really great resource for information and fellowship)

I really liked this article, I think it gave some great advice and I would like to add some of my thoughts to it.

• Remember that the disabled person you or your child is curious about is out doing their thing: shopping, working, whatever. Keeping that in mind, I believe it is okay to say something like, "Hi! My child is curious about your cane/wheelchair/helper animal, and I don't know much about it, myself. Would you mind chatting with us about it for a moment?"

• No one is obligated to educate you,  we are not required to act as representatives of X population on demand, so be graceful if your request is denied. We are not your "teachable moment."

• It is also okay to say "I do not know a lot about that, so we can look it up together when we get home."

• Teach your kids that helper animals are not pets, and should not be treated as such. 

• Talk directly to the person, not their aid, unless they or the aid indicates otherwise. Sometimes folks will talk to the person pushing my chair about me rather than to me, and that is indescribably rude.

• Do not use disabled people as an object lesson. Seriously. In a store, I heard an adult tell a child, "You will be in a wheelchair, too,  if you do not learn to look before crossing the street!" Do I need to say that this displays an incredible lack of decorum or social awareness?

Do you have anything else you would like to add, or ask? Feel free to do so in the comments.

I am working on a couple of other posts, and hope to have more up soon. Thanks for stopping by!